If I Could Turn Back Time…

Hey there everyone. It’s yer favorite Ultimate Despair Allan here and I’m here to tell ya what I would do if I could do over my high school life.

Seeing as how I’m about to graduate and go to college, I thought I’d share anything I would change that happened in these past 4 years.

First and foremost, I would have participated more in my gardening club from the start if I knew how much fun it was then. I get to see my friends and help them out with plants even if I don’t quite understand some of the lingo used. I’m there to have a good time and help out in any way I can.

Second, I would go back and be brave enough to get to know people that I was interested in earlier rather than later on in my junior year. Since freshman year there were a few people I had trouble speaking to or even walking up to but today I can goof around them and just be crazy ol’ me. I still have friends that I’ve been very close to since freshman year and honestly I’m really glad I met them too.

On the topic of friends, I would avoid those who brought me into their problems without my consent and simply just go my own way as I do today.

Third thing I would change…would be to start researching video game design early on so I can get a good start later on because while my motivation and adaptability can help with anything, a little experience and some help wouldn’t hurt and would probably make the road to game design just a smidge easier.

Not to say I don’t like a good challenge. Games have always provided me with the challenge I crave so much and lately they’ve been getting better as I’ve beaten Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice 4 times and got the Platinum trophy for it. Very challenging but I never gave up and that’s the kind of challenge I want to provide for others. A game that tests you and awakens your ability to adapt to a difficult situation by thinking outside the box or simply noticing patterns after countless tries that prove fatal to the enemy.

Lastly…if I had the ability to turn back time to the beginnings of High School… I would have broken out of my shell more. The end of Junior year is when I started to realize how amazing I am as my friends and family have told me and what I observed were my own skills. Give me a writing prompt of something from a long while ago and I may take 5 minutes to figure out what it is and start thinking as I’m writing. I’m proud of who I am today and I’m really glad my close friends can see the real me. I would have opened up to these people early on because of how much love I have for them.

So yeah, there you have it. I cherish my good experiences because they remind me of such joy and laughter and I don’t regret my bad experiences because I have learned from them and matured enough to become a man I can be proud of. These are the things I would do differently if I could turn back the clock. What would you change if you had the same power? I would love to hear your answers and I plan to become more active in the summer. Thank you for taking the time to read this lengthy emotional post and I’ll see y’all next time. Ultimate Despair out!

Easter Break

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Hello there everyone! It’s yer favorite Ultimate Despair here and I have arrived to tell you all about my week long break.

So for my Easter break, I was introduced to this mobile game that came out last September called Dragalia Lost and I have been hooked on it for a week now! I am not the biggest fan of mobile games as I feel that most of the ones that I have come across are pay to play or pay to win and that is a huge turn off for me from a game. Dragalia however does not require you to pay to catch up with everyone else or do well in the game and this is what intrigued me.

See the source image It’s actually a ton of fun to play and I was really interested in one of the characters I summoned whose name is Estelle (she’s a healer and I typically love the support role in games). I spent a lot of my break playing Dragalia Lost and I arrived at a good time since there is a collaboration event going on between Dragalia Lost and Fire Emblem Heroes so if you want tp try it, now would be a very good opportunity to do so.

I also went to the theaters with my mother and aunt to watch Hellboy which was my first movie with actual gore. I’m not a big fan of extremely violent movies but the main reason I liked the movie was because of Hellboy himself as he was very down to Earth and expressed how he felt as humans viewed him as a monster instead of seeing him for the precious cinnamon bun he really is.

Not only did I see Hellboy, but I saw Avengers Endgame as well on Friday but I’m gonna wait a long while before I think about reviewing it because #DontSpoilTheEndgame.

The new event for Overwatch recently came out so I’ve been playing competitive, the new Storm Rising event, and the other 2 events from last year. Storm Rising really isn’t anything special to me and I consider it a major flop compared to the last 2 events, but the interactions between Genji and Mercy are nice (I ship them :]).

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So that is all from me on my Easter break. It’s been pretty enjoyable and I’m glad I found a mobile game I actually like and that I was able to see Endgame without being spoiled. See ya next time homies, Ultimate Despair out!

Big Apple Comic Con

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Hello there everyone! It’s yer favorite Ultimate Despair Allan coming right back at ya with a new blog. Today I’m going to talk about my first time at comic con last Sunday

So I went to the Big Apple Comic Con in New York and despite its small size compared to other conventions, every booth fit well and it wasn’t cramped in the slightest. When I first went up the stairs I met this woman with an incredible cosplay of 2B from NieR: Automata and I just had to get a picture (it has my face so not showing it :p) and that started it off pretty well.

message_1552445993669 My favorite section of the whole convention was the art section and by God was it amazing. I ran into this booth that specialized in pixel art and it was like super cool! I bought a Baby pixel from Five Nights at Freddy’s and now she sits on my computer stand reminding me to be careful since most characters I like either have pigtails or are menacing such as Baby herself. The booth even had some meme pixel art such as the caveman SpongeBob and Ugandan Knuckles.

: Art by @grandpabats_ on Instagram. He has really amazing art so go check him out.

My favorite booth was this one that actually popped out to me because of the sheer quality of the art. The artist’s (grandpabats_ on Instagram) booth was composed of everything I loved. It had Little Miss Muffet from Undertale who is my favorite character because of her amazing music, fun character, and cute spider helpers, Undyne the Undying in her determination form, Lapis Lazuli from Steven Universe, Taiga and Ryuji from Toradora, and the list goes on and on. Basically this guy had everything I knew in his booth and I kept coming back to buy more art because they were amazing. I went with my aunt and even though she may not know these characters, she still loved it too and saw what I saw in that grandpabats had the best booth in the building for me.

message_1552446071150-1 — Art by @grandpabats_ on Instagram

There was also this booth that had pendants, rings, and keychains based on anime and video games. I bought a Hylian shield pendant from the Legend of Zelda although the chain was a bit small so I need to look for one. It’s decorative on my computer stand as I put it in the model of a chest that’s being guarded by this ferocious dragon. So the shield is the treasure and the dragon just likes the shininess. The other booths had tons of good art too but none of them caught my eye as much as grandpabats and the pixel booth did. It was still my favorite section of the whole convention and I can’t wait to go to another one possibly in June.

That is all I have for you lovely folks today. Thanks for taking the time to check up on me over here and I’ll see y’all next time on Total Despair Island! Ultimate Despair Out!

20190310_132521_burst01 — Art by @grandpabats_ on Instagram. My favorite piece of Lapis Lazuli

My Friday Off

Yelloooo there everyone! Long time no see. I’ve been busy these past couple months but I’m here to tell ya what I did last Friday since it was a day off for me.

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Sooooo I pretty much played Super Smash Bros. Ultimate for a good portion of the day since I’m trying out some new characters like Kirby and King Dedede although I am thinking of trying out Chrom after today. Kirby has a surprisingly fun play-style as he has really good air game, recovery, and has RAW power.

I also played some Overwatch since there is a new lunar new year event that’s out and I’ve got my hands on all the skins I wanted so this event was a success for me. I’m learning to play Soldier: 76 more since I want to be more of a dsp/support main. I managed to get through the placement matches for competitive Capture the Flag and ranked in the middle as a platinum. It took a while but it was quite fun and is the reason why I’m getting more into damaging than tanking.

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Finally, last Friday I actually started to re-watch Kirby: Right Back at Ya! Like everything Nintendo makes, this has aged very well and some episodes almost made me tear up. To anyone looking for a cartoon with great writing and funny characters that you can relate to, I highly suggest this. Even though Kirby is only able to say “Poyo” for the majority of the show, he still manages to express himself very well and it honestly works which was a total surprise to me. Also, King Dedede literally has the best voice I’ve heard from a cartoon character and it’s my head-canon for Dedede anytime I see him.

So yeah, that was my Friday off and it was quite enjoyable. Thanks for taking the time out of yer day for me and I’ll see you all later. Ultimate Despair out!

Happy Late Thanksgiving!

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Alright soooo I may be a little late but I’m here to wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving next year! Now I’m early so don’t bash on me ;).

My Thanksgiving started on the night of the day itself…more so it started at around 10 pm so I was pretty hungry by then. It was nice to spend time with the family as well as my sister came to visit from college for a few days.

Thanksgiving to me is the awaiting of the glorious mountain of food that comes with the holiday with turkey and cranberries being my favorite part.

It’s a nice day for family to get together and it was just a good day in general. My thanks go out to my mother who raised me to the best me I can be and my sister who although may not be here a lot of time, she does make up for it for being home when I need some company and she makes it enjoyable by watching shows with me and having good talks.

A lot of my thanks also go to the middle school friends that have stuck with me all this time. We’re basically inseparable and yes, we do have some arguments but nothing has really come between us. FYI We are called the Despair Brothers and the name is half my idea since Junko Enoshima is my favorite character of all time and we just adopted the name. So yeah those guys are the best and we’ve been through the rough of it these past few years but we stick together as true brothers do.

My high school friends deserve thanks as well as I have met rather unique people. These friends mean the world to me and they help me grow each and every day. I make it a habit to show people the effort I put into my friendships and it pays off greatly. So much has happened in these past 3 years and this year is gonna be even better.

So yeah…there’s my super late but full of heart thanksgiving blog. I’ll see y’all later. Ultimate Despair out!

Let’s Talk: Overwatch

Hey there! It’s your favorite son of Big Boss here bringing my opinions on Overwatch, which is a fantasy shooter that I absolutely love but have problems with as well.

Overwatch has been a big part of my recent involvement in more multiplayer games and this is because unlike other games I find a bit bland now like Call of Duty or The Division, Overwatch is always changing and can always be played a different way.

On the first week that I purchased Overwatch, which was August 2016, I devoted myself to the cool cyborg ninja dude Genji! I’m a huge fan of ninjas and their superhuman abilities in games such as Aragami so when I saw Genji I was ecstatic.

Over the past 2 years that I’ve been playing Overwatch, I’ve actually managed to bond with and become better friends with people from my school. This game really does bring people together because of its very wide selection of characters and play styles to choose from. You can go in swinging a hammer, shooting rockets from the spy, sniping with a bow and arrow, or even just sitting there and letting your own turret do all the work for you ;).

Although I praise this game for its wonderful game play and magnificent world-building, I have a lot that I REALLY don’t like either. Case in point, the competitive scene.

My buddies and I have gone through Overwatch for the past 2 years but most of them aren’t into competitive Overwatch so I tried it myself…emphasis on tried. When I go into competitive alone, I get people who leave the match when we’re winning, trolls who just want to bring the whole team down and ruin the game, and even stubborn players who refuse to switch characters simply because they all want to be the stars of the match.

Another problem is the balancing of the characters (Brigitte) and how Blizzard (creators of Overwatch) fails to address all the problems of their own game. McCree for example, is an old-fashioned Wild West like cowboy armed with a revolver and some flashbangs. He does a lot of damage but suffers heavily from his lack of mobility as all he has is a roll on a long cooldown and his ultimate slows him down even more making him an easy target.

Mercy is another character that Blizzard hasn’t shown very much love for. Mercy is a lot less viable than she was before in the game as they removed her ultimate to resurrect a number of people and made it into a 30 second cooldown ability (games typically last around 10 minutes so this really isn’t a lot). Her healing has been reduced to the point where she cannot heal more than the weakest character in the game can do damage, and her new ultimate has been downgraded to the point where the only values of it is that she can fly and extend her healing and damage beam to the whole team.

I play healers and I play tanks. The majority of these players religiously play offense like its their destiny. When I follow one of these offense players like say…another Genji, I get left behind and bashed on for “not doing my job” when there are 4 other people on the team who need my help. No matter what happens however, I still manage to keep calm and I currently am in Platinum which you could say is where the majority of players are and I’m proud of my rank.

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The whole Mercy downgrade over the year really does irk me as I love to play healer as well. One of my favorite healers is Moira, who is a biological scientist who can heal a large amount of health with a limit and can inflict damage for a good amount in which it heals her and refills her biotic energy. She can also throw orbs of healing and damage and her ultimate is a coalescent laser combining her healing and damage which does major healing and damage.

I’m very passionate about this game and I may be all over the place when talking about it, but it really is a great game. It brings friends together and allows for a multiplayer and team based experience that hasn’t been seen for years. Overwatch brings out the best and the worst of me as I’m a bit loud when playing but I’m more aware and am able to alert my team when danger is coming from a side they’re not looking at. Really…this game is great.

And with that, I take my leave and am glad to have shared with all of you the beauty and ugliness of Overwatch. It was great talking about this and I’ll see you all later! Ultimate Despair out!

Overwatch-Winter-Wonderland-Screenshots-21-1280x720 — My favorite hero, Torbjorn as our fellow hero Santa Claus

Status on College Preparations

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Hello there everyone! Your favorite Ultimate Despair is back with an update on his college stuff! I’ll be covering my opinions for staying instead of going away and what I have in the way of getting everything ready for college.

So to start off, I want to stay near home instead of going away to some far away college because I have a lot more options at home and if I did go, I’d basically be away from my family and all my amazing friends that I spend time with over here.

I would be lonely and miss home and my friends and it wouldn’t be the same so I decided to stay near home and it’s going rather well.

My college list is getting smaller everyday as I’m putting the finishing touches to my college essay in which I’m writing about passion and love for all life. I find that writing a formal essay about myself is difficult as I have difficulty complimenting myself or giving myself credit where credit is due. Nevertheless, I am pretty good in writing and thinking on the spot so it should be a cinch.

Thanks to the new age of technology (glad I was born this time period), finding colleges is much easier as websites like Naviance and The Common App make it easier to set up a resume and find colleges that have what I need.

I originally thought that game design would be a pretty hard major to find but surprisingly, there are a ton that I have to work with and am able to look into. Game design is my dream and I plan to make it a reality. I aspire to be a game designer that’s as successful as Hideo Kojima cause that man is my inspiration for good storytelling and game design.

So yeah, that’s the status on my college work and it’s coming along quite nicely. This was an…interesting subject for me to share but I see it as a good first step towards being able to branch myself out more with different topics. Later this week, you’ll be seeing another game review (depends how long the game is which has me pumped) so thanks for keeping up with me and I’ll see y’all later. Ultimate Despair out!

My Plans for the Future

Hello there everyone! I’m here to talk about my future and the plans I have in store. To start this off, I strive to become a game designer and a writer.

The idea for game designing comes from my passion for gaming and how much I love to play games. I’ve played games like the Metal Gear series, Danganronpa, and Pokemon.

My reason for wanting to become a game designer is making others as happy as I am whenever I play a game with such good storytelling and amazing characters like Junko Enoshima and Big Boss.

I’ve also improved on my writing over the years as I enjoy creating narratives and I’ve taken notes from the games and anime I’ve experienced. Gaming is my passion and it’s my firm belief that it always will be.

There are a lot of games out there that don’t get the recognition they deserve but carry so much emotion like NieR:Automata. I plan to help design a game just as great if not better than it.

I don’t want this all to be about games, but I do tend to get a bit passionate with my interests (I could talk about Metal Gear all day <3). The writing part stems from my enjoyment from reading books with twists and excellent storytelling like The Hunger Games.

A story with good twists and character development never lets me down and I intend to take a page out of the books I’ve read to become better. My plans are like a dream to me and this dream is going to become a reality.

Well that’s all I have for today but I’ll be back soon. Thanks for stopping by and I’ll see you all soon! Ultimate Despair out!

P.S. Hideo Kojima is my HERO. Best designer EVER <3.

My Stunning Introduction!

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Hey there. The name’s Allan, passionate Gamer and long-time anime lover, and I have come here to introduce myself to the world and this is the start of my blog.

I am an student aspiring to be a video game designer and creative writer so I can pull off amazing twists and emotionally griping scenes like The Boss scene in Metal Gear Solid 3 between Snake and his mentor.

I like to speak my mind although I often can be a bit loud or dramatic with my wording. Nevertheless, I can also be shy and be a bit too emotional at times.

I really love TV shows like Gravity Falls, Spectacular Spider-Man, and Money Heist.

My favorite games include the entirety of the Metal Gear series, the Danganronpa series, and Overwatch.

I enjoy jokes in general but my favorite types are really bad jokes like: “What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator!” Yeah I know it’s pretty lame but to each their own and I admire the courage people get to say horrible jokes like that.

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I have a pug and he’s basically my brother since he’s been with us for about 8 years. He’s very fond of people and is generally a sweet and LAZY dog. His name is Leon and he likes watching me rage at Overwatch but really hates being woken up as anyone would.

Well this seems to be all I have for now but do not fear citizens, I shall return another day. This was fun to write and I plan to do more of this so I’ll see you all later. Ultimate Despair out!